The next time you are approaching an attempt at resolving conflict with someone, spend some time thinking about conflict and how it has factored into your life.
Did you grow up seeing healthy conflict resolution? Or did you see yelling, name-calling, stonewalling and avoidance?
Often we may not recognize the impact that our childhood experiences have on our ability to handle conflict as an adult. But now, you can choose your actions and approach to conflict resolution. You can also choose what you would like to leave behind.
You might ask yourself questions like:
What did I see growing up, when it came to conflict?
What lessons did I learn from that?
What view of conflict do I hold now?
What feelings come up for me around the topic of conflict?
In general, am I passive, aggressive or assertive when it comes to conflict?